A good 8000 people read my last article on how your could start winning on Tinder in 4 steps, with quite a few emails and requests for more tips and help from some really genuine guys who just wanna get a bit more face time with potential partners.
I’ve been replying privately, but I’m noticing some common threads, so I’ve decided to pull all of these together to give you a little bit more insight into how you can up your Tinder game even further.
1. Adjust the Date Range in Tinder’s Settings!
Yeah. Plenty of people just start swiping without checking out the date range. I received multiple emails about “the pool running dry” or that you’re “getting girls that are too young”. Everyone emailing me like…
No the pool is not running dry. You’re not at the pool, you’re at the drain next to the pool!
Go into your settings, check out the age range, and then start adjusting for effect. I recommend that you go about 3 years down, and 3 years upwards (don’t frown, you’ll be surprised at the girls you find ok). So, if you’re 30, your age range is 27 to 33. You’ll reach a more relevant age group, and have a better subsequent connection.
2. Open without a Pickup Line
Don’t be sleazy, and don’t be desperate. Using innuendo, asking for “Sex?”, or asking if someone wants to be Friends with benefits will not work. 99% of the women on Tinder won’t give you the time of the day, and that other 1%? Well you really don’t want to get involved with that kind of crazy.
Instead, be friendly and make it a point to text first. I really think that if you take a genuine, honest approach to online communication, you could end up with some pretty good responses. My favourite way to start is to tell someone why I swiped right, and invite her to do the same. It usually draws a good response.
Open first, invite a response, and keep the conversation going organically.
3. Talking Points
Online dating apps like Tinder are all about talking points. The more points of references you can draw inference or conversation from, the better. Look for things like:
- Common Friends
- Common Interests (If they connected Facebook to Tinder)
- Travel Photos
- Instagram Photos (If they connected Instagram to Tinder)
The key thing here is to ask questions, listen, and then replying without oversharing. Don’t hog the limelight. Instead, let her tell you more about what she thinks, and then reply with what you honestly think about the subject topic. Spy a photo of her messing around at the Eiffel Tower but haven’t been there yourself? Ask her how it felt to be there. You’ll be talking about other stuff in no time.
4. Like Her? Take it to WhatsApp
A lot of guys, and one girl (shoutout to that brave soul!) email me with this one question:
“How do keep the other person talking?”
It’s a damned good question, and something that is supremely challenging. After all, they have zero obligation to continue communication with you, and there’s just no hook for them to stay. My solution? Move it to WhatsApp.
Why? The Tinder app works beautifully, but it’s vulnerable to bugs and saps battery because of Location Services. Remove that barrier of entry, and it’s just psychologically easier for your opposite number to pick up the phone and reply when you send a text.
That’s why, if you really want to start dating offline, then you need to take that conversation off Tinder. Your goal, with every solid match that consistently replies, is to take it to Whatsapp. Of course, you could choose Line, Telegram or any other messaging app, but Whatsapp also gets you her/his number.
What next? Well, keep texting and ask her out. You have to do it eventually, so do it while she gives a hoot about your existence. At this point, it’s important not to let any rejection get to you. If she says “no”, that’s fine. be polite about it but move on.
Well, that’s it! I hope that with this, you’ll have a better time conversing and meeting new people! Keep swiping and don’t give up because your match might be waiting past that next right swipe!